Will this ‘perfect coach’ change your life/business or?

I saw an article the other week about the ‘ideal best friend’ relationship and what if that existed would this BFF be like. (You can read that article here…but read this one first, okay?)

It got me thinking about the ‘ideal coach’ – if this existed what would she look like?

I started to think about me, what has ever driven me to say YES to work with someone. After all it is such an intimate thing, to open up to someone, to share your challenges, fears, difficulties and to look to someone, to whom you have also paid money to for their expertise/support. 

Of course I have considered is there such a thing as the ‘perfect coach’ … is there a model to aspire to be?

On one hand no, of course not; because it is such a personal thing to choose a coach, yet on the other hand a yes – because it is about service, integrity, authenticity and the ability to create the transformation, growth and expansion that you seek. Yet what those elements mean are through your own lenses.

It isn’t new news that the coaching industry has boomed, some may say saturated. It isn’t new news that there are a lot of ‘copycat coaches’ out there who are riding on the back of some book or something that they learned or literally copied from someone else. There are like any industry some who are simply not that good, mediocre and some who are outstanding. It’s the same in any industry so this isn’t a ‘dis’ at coaching.

However it is an eye opener. Just because someone has a website, some presence on social media…including a self-published book or two….does it really provide ‘social proof’ that they are going to give you what they say they do?

So if the perfect coach archetype existed along with service, integrity, authenticity and the ability to create the transformation, growth and expansion that you seek I would add likeability – if you don’t get on, if you don’t have respect then the ability to make yourself available to be coached by them  falls apart. I don’t want a new BFF, however rapport is essential.

While my way for my own decision making is always intuitive, there is always a logical sifting and filter and sometimes when offered a choice between 2 or more coaches who feel perfect to me, my decision boils down to what I share above because ultimately I like , no I love to spend money with those I love too. It’s just my way, maybe it is yours too!

I decided to ask a few coaches that are rocking the coaching world, fanning the flames of success and leading the way for other women (and men) to step forward in fullness what they would have as their ‘must-have’ criteria for this ‘perfect coach model’.

Each coach I asked has her own area of expertise, walks their talk and while I will not try and tell you that this is some definitive list that is ‘IT’ – it gives some really powerful food for thought.

What I found fascinating is…

• No-one (even the ones who didn’t have time to be share a quote but some had a mini discussion with me) said that testimonials matter. Not saying that they don’t but interesting, I thought. What about you?
• No-one talked about ‘list size’ ‘fan page following’ – well at least not per se…!
• What really has juiced the women who have shared for me falls into the category of authenticity, walking the talk, not just talking it and being strong enough to be a catalyst for change…here take a look at what has been shared:

Yvette Taylor, creator of the Energy Alignment Method said for her an essential must have requirement for a coach would be:

“…making sure that they understand EVERYTHING about me and that they look at me, my life and my business as a whole and not just look at my business as ONE discrete entity.”

Sarah Arrow, blog lady extraordinaire shared:

“…The perfect coach has the experience, they walk the walk and should always be a level above where you want to be as well as be able to forget their own business when coaching you…AKA making it client-centric!”

Nicola Bird, who makes simplicity simple in all areas of life, shared her insights into what would be an essential requirement for this perfect coach, if we were to ever create her….

“I used to choose my current coach because they were doing and achieving what I wanted to. Now I work with people when I’m attracted to the way their being. I want my coach to be grounded, insightful…”

Allison Marlowe the creator of Global Winning Women, shared:

“For me, the perfect coach or mentor has two vital qualities. Firstly, they need to be someone who can see my blind spots – point out things I’m not consciously aware of, whether those are strengths, weaknesses or opportunities. Having someone open my eyes to what’s beyond my perception is crucial. Secondly, they must be able to call me on my stuff. To have the courage and the sensitivity to  challenge me and reflect back to me when I’m not acting in integrity with my highest self, or when I’m falling back into old patterns. Without those qualities, I know I won’t be able to grow.”

Veronica Pullen, the Social Marketing Queen shared her must have requirement for a coach would be:

“My requirement is that they must already be doing what they coach, well. So if they’re advising clients to do something, I’d want to see them doing it in their own business already.” (In fact so much so that Veronica also said it was a pet hate, if a coach isn’t doing what they suggest to a client without disclosure. Would it be a ‘deal breaker’ for you too?)

Lenka Lutonska shared her magic ingredient for her ‘perfect’ coach too:

“She cares about her clients deeply. She cares about ME.” (I have to high five this one as the ‘not emotionally involved’ spiel or the ‘not attached to your success (read failures but I will tell everyone when you are a success so I can claim it as your coach too) is way too on the fence, as you can care deeply without owning someone else’s ‘shizzle!)

Over to you…what has resonated with you the most about the ‘must-have’ requirements for a coach? What would you add? I would love for you to join this discussion and hey you can even use this to create your own set of requirements for your next coach…!

Sarupa Shah